to get full education or to get what I want??
-- i arrived here in the Philippines when i was 16. I was really excited, because there were some things that can't be done else where than here in the Philippines. When i first arrived i was too eager to explore the country, to go places, to meet and mingle with new people, although i do come here every summer break with had at Dubai. But, things were different now. My parents wanted me to be admitted at the best school's that they could offer me. However, i didn't, i just wanted to study at any university or college, my whole plan was just to go to school and graduate. But my parents wanted more out of me. They had me take numerous entrance exams, like at University of the Philippines, Ateneo de Manila, and at University of Asia and the Pacific. Even though i did pass the entrance examinations held at those universities, i had doubted my self if was really ready on taking up college.
a dream burning down..
-- my parents wants me to choose between UA&P and ADMU, how could i decide?? both of them are great schools that offer great courses and education. But, was i prepared?? the answer to that was, no. I still wasnt prepared to go to school, to start my college life. after staying at UA&P for one year, i was kicked out. My grades at UA&P weren't that great, some of them were just hanging by a thread. But that university had high standards that i really cant reach. And so my parents decided for me to choose another school to go to.
a dream burning down pt.II
-- i decided to go to CENTRO ESCOLAR UNIVERSITY. i had a friend from high school who also studied at CEU, so i checked it out, if the school was ok. Later on, i found my self making new friends at the start of the first semester of my first year college, i had to take on being a first year student again, since i still had a lot of back subjects from my previous school. i was really starting to enjoy studying at CEU, i already got a chance to step foot on being a 2nd year student. and it was really a great feeling for me, even though i still had about 2 or 3 back subjects. but, hey, its a start for someone who is still having doubts on going to school. another year had passed by and i was about to start my 3rd yr life at CEU, the first semester was already starting and i was already about to take on my midterm examinations, however, my parents still wasn't satisfied with my performance. my father went to school, and paid for the whole semester and asked the school for may credentials, as they have decided for me to stop, and transfer again to a new school.
getting tired of this..
-- my parents always had issues about me being gay, although they really didn't know that i was gay. i never really told them or showed them that i was gay or bisexual. they never doubted my sexuality before, since i did had a girlfriend before way back in high school. i gotta admit my first ever relationship with a guy was here in the Philippines when i was still studying at CEU. but i didn't let my personal life get in the way of my studies. i wanted to finish my studies right away. my parents and i had a deal, that when i finish college, i could do what ever i want with my life, so i really wanted to finish it for good. but like i mentioned before, i had no choice but to stop, and transfer to another school. now the reason why my parents forced me out of CEU, was because of the gay community that was building up at the school. and some of my close friends at school were also gay, i had no choice, they were friendly, and they did really become my friends. and the second reason was that they still didn't like the way my grades were. hayz...
manila now, cebu tomorrow..
-- I'm really getting tired of not being able to make a decision for my self. by this time my parents were already telling me that i had to transfer to cebu and live an independent life, since they think that i would be able to handle it, and my father specifically said that "doon ka na sa cebu, para wala ng mangingi-alam sa iyo, at para wala ng makakapag impluwensya sa iyo ng masama, tulad ng mga bisyo mo."
hayz.. i had no choice, i really didn't want to transfer anymore, i didn't want to go to the same process of making friends again, getting subjects, filling up forms, and stuff. but i had no choice. before i could object to and demand to stay here, i was already in a plane going to cebu.
cebu? fun or not?
-- i was mistakenly wrong about Cebu, its freakingly beautiful here!! and to add it up, im completely free!! no one to look over my shoulders, telling me what to do, and to remind me constantly that i need to study hard.. in the long run, i still returned to manila. my dad had to take a leave from his job in Dubai, and made sure that i was really studying in Cebu. But when he got there, i already flunked most of my subjects, except for my one major. for which i am really proud of, because that was the only subject that i got for grade of 1, which is the highest grade i already attained in my life!! but since i did flunked the rest of my subjects, my parents still got furious, hey, who wouldn't be, right?
the only reason why i didn't attend my classes when i was still in cebu, was because i was so overwhelmed of my freedom, of me being able to things that i want to do, staying out at the late hours of the night, drinking out with friends, and going out with numerous guys, pero syempre safe sex pa rin.. hehehe..
but in the end my father bought a ticket for me to go back to manila.
home again..
-- whew, even though i only stayed in cebu for about one semester, i got to admit, i really missed my room and MANILA!! ÜÜ i was really excited when i was at Mactan airport waiting to board the plane, but at the same time, nervous was playing in me. as to what was i going to do now, and a lot of questions were already popping out of my head. if my parents would still let me go to school?? if they would still accept me being their child?? or would the hatred fill their hearts for the wrong doings that i have done to them.
i arrived in manila, on the 24th of june 2006, and my mom was the one who picked me up at the airport. and told me that i was not going back to school.
when i heard those words coming out of my mothers mouth, i was in shock. because they have been saying that line since i got kicked out of UA&P. and here i was, sitting in the car, reminiscing on my previous college lives since 2003. i knew when my mother said that i wasn't going back to college, i felt that this time it was already real. on the following day, i was able to think by myself in my room. thinking that i didn't want to be burden to my parents, i decided to work and earn money for myself.
06/26/2006 was our batch number at this call center company i worked, i was already earning money at the age of 19. i was living the life, being able to buy things that i want, being able to go places I've never been too.. but something was missing,,,...
a few years has passed and I'm still working at the same company.. then i wanted my career to grow, so i tried to apply for a higher position. Since i already worked in the call center industry for about 3 years, i decided to apply for a QA position, or Quality Analyst/Assurance, however, i didn't get the job. one of the criteria was that the applicant needs to be a college graduate. IT SUCKS. i did have all the other requirements, in terms of product knowledge, strengths and everything else, i just didn't pass because i was an undergraduate.
Then it hit me like a fast curve ball, i needed to finish my studies, i need to graduate.
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